Strength Is the New Skinny

For years, "skinny" was the goal. Smaller. Lighter. Less.

The last few years, being in my 40s, taught me something different: strength is the new skinny.

I wrote about this on Instagram recently — why strength matters more than ever in your 40s — and I want to go deeper here, because this shift in mindset changed how I think about my body entirely.

The Truth About Our 40s

After 30, we naturally start losing muscle mass — and it accelerates in our 40s. Less muscle means a slower metabolism, weaker bones, higher injury risk, and less energy for the life we actually want to live.

Nobody told me this in my 20s. I was too busy chasing the number on the scale.

Why I Stopped Chasing Skinny

Skinny was never really about health. It was about how I looked in a photo. Strength is different — strength is about what my body can actually do.

I train 2–3 times a week now — a mix of weights, pilates, and bodyweight work. Not because I'm chasing a smaller size. Because I want to carry my own luggage at 70. Because I want to play with my grandchildren one day without my body holding me back.

What Strength Actually Requires

Training — I train 2–3 times a week, mixing gym sessions (weights, resistance training) with pilates. Some days that means a proper session; other days it's just 20–30 minutes in my basement gym at home.

Consistency matters more than intensity.

Protein — muscle needs protein to repair and grow, and most women in their 40s simply aren't eating enough of it. A simple formula to calculate your target: bodyweight (kg) × 1.2 to 1.6g = your daily protein target.

For example, at 60kg, that's roughly 72–96g of protein a day. Older adults and beginners to strength training often do best at the higher end of that range. I make sure every meal has a protein source, and I supplement when my meals fall short — especially after a workout.

Sleep — this is honestly my ongoing work in progress. Muscle isn't just built in the gym — it's repaired while you sleep.

The Science: When Sleep Actually Heals You

Growth hormone — the hormone responsible for repairing muscle and cells — surges the most during deep sleep, and the biggest release happens in your very first sleep cycle, within about 90 minutes of falling asleep.

That means the earlier you're asleep, the more of that prime repair window you actually get. Aim to be asleep before 11pm — the deep-sleep-heavy cycles are more concentrated earlier in the night, so going to bed late costs you more than just total hours.

Most adults need 7–9 hours to get enough of these repair cycles in. Below 6 hours, that hormone release drops off significantly.

The Real Shift

Skinny asks: how do I take up less space?

Strong asks: how do I build a body that carries me through the next 40 years?

That's the shift I'm making. Not for how I look — for how I want to live.

If this resonated, I'd love to chat — reach out and I'll send you my entire cheat sheet: what I eat, where I train, and my tips for better sleep.

With love, Elynn